This year for Mother's Day my gift was speaking in sacrament meeting! Which is something I really dreaded doing. And if truth be told, I have somewhat been avoiding it and hiding from the bishopric in general.
Speaking in sacrament meeting is bad enough, but Mother's Day! What mother wants to speak on Mother's Day? I knew I had nothing profound to say and I know that I have never claimed to be the best mother or to have all the answers. But the Bishop didn't seem to care or Dirk for that matter, since he was the one who agreed to the offer without asking!! What?!?! How could he do this to me I thought. I stewed and brewed about it for 2 weeks! I changed my talk 3 times or more. And not only my talk did I have to worry about, but the girls' too. Then to top it off, Jeslyn agreed to give the talk in primary on the very same Sunday that we had to speak in sacrament meeting. I guess I needed one more thing to research! I am glad to report that Sunday came and went and once I got the congregation laughing, all went well from there. I might add...that everyone else did spectacular! I a going to post my talk at the very bottom of this post mostly for my posterity, but also for any of you who feel inspired to read it. I only ask that you please don't be critical...it was a very hard thing for me to do and I am certain it is far from perfect.
The BEST thing about Mother's Day is...ALL MY LOVES!
Mother’s Day is a wonderful time for each of us to take a
moment and honor motherhood. Motherhood is not merely defined by the bearing
and raising of children but is rather a statement regarding the divine nature
of women. All women, whether or not they bear children, can fulfill the role of
mothers.
As a mother, I look to examples of my own mom, Dirk’s mom,
and many women I know, including those in this ward. I appreciate all of the
help and insights I gain from these women. My challenges and joys are different
than yours, but I can learn from your examples of faith, dedication, and
perseverance and apply it to what works best for me and my family.
My mother is an amazing woman. Growing up she was always
known as a “farm mom or farmer’s wife”. One who worked every day to raise her
family, care for the livestock and the land and keep up with all the housework. My farm mom could get teenagers out of bed at
5:00 am if needed, but also would let us kids sleep in from time to time after
a long day of work on the ranch and farm. My farm mom always had a garden to
weed, tomatoes to can, brownies to bake and PTA meetings to attend. Her chores
included cleaning, laundry and cooking for her family, as well as hosting late
night movie parties for teens, while staying up late to check heifers in labor
every 3 hours during the night. When the family puts a day on the calendar to
work cattle, my farm mom is in charge of everything from the vaccine to making
sure the equipment is in working order, organizing the list of cows and their calves
to match up. She gets up early on the day to start a hearty lunch and packs it
all up to be cooked in between herds. She puts the vaccine and equipment in the
coolers, loads the drinks and gets dressed to work. Us kids usually needed to
be pulled out of bed and hauled to the truck, where we were awakened on the way
to the pasture to put in a full day of physical work—right alongside our Farm
Mom and Farm Dad. At lunchtime, mom puts the finishing touches on the meal,
then cleans up the mess and heads back to the corrals with the family to finish
the work the rest the afternoon. Often my farm mom’s day is not over until the
sun sets and sometimes later. But then the laundry needs folded and the grocery
list made for the next time she heads to town. She is also the short order
baker who provides brownies, cookies and cakes for bake sales, church meals,
and school activities. She oversees us kids feeding the livestock, and has her
own chores to do. My farm mom is one of the hardest working people I’ve ever
met. Her job is a true 24/7/365 job! She is always “on the clock”—even on
vacation! But as she would tell you, being a “Farm Mom” is the best job she has
ever had in her entire life! Isn’t this
what we all do? My mom does whatever it
takes to keep our family together. A
farm mom, a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, a grandmother, all women in
general…are all very similar. Each one has things to do and responsibilities to
fulfill. There are more things that make them alike, than ways they are
different. My farm mom is just that…a mom…who runs a household and a farm…and
who is raising 4 kids (still, even though we all are married and gone)
Who can ever forget a mother’s wisdom?
Mothers teach LOGIC…If you fall off that swing and break
your legs, don’t come running to her.
Mothers teach MEDICINE…If you don’t stop crossing your eyes,
they’re going to stay that way.
Mothers teach us TO THINK AHEAD…If you don’t pass your test,
you’ll never get a good job!
Mothers teach us INTUITION…Put your jacket on you’re going
to catch a cold!
Mothers teach us TO MEET A CHALLENGE…What were you thinking?
Answer me when I talk to you…Don’t talk back to me!
Mothers teach us how to BECOME AN ADULT…If you don’t eat
your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.
Mothers teach us about GENETICS…You are just like your
father!
Mothers teach us about our ROOTS…Close that door; do you
think you were born in a barn?
Mothers teach us about the WISDOM of AGE…When you get to be
my age, you will understand.
Mothers teach us about ANTICIPATION…Just wait until your
father gets home.
Mothers are very influential. I am certain the majority of
you have heard the quote: “If daddy ain’t happy, who cares? But If momma ain’t
happy, ain’t nobody happy!” That is true in our house (At least the part about
mom being happy) I think it is fair to say it is probably true in most homes as
well.
In our role as mothers and as women with divine nature, how
do we balance being pulled in so many different directions? How do we
positively handle the stress that is part of our life and our tendency to be
impatient? Most importantly, how do we teach the next generation of “stripling
warriors” to be responsible, kind, faithful, steadfast, and to develop
testimonies?
The only way I know how to deal with these issues—and so
many others we face —is to rely on the Lord, and to turn to His teachings and
His example. Try to emulate the things he did and taught—and when we stumble
(which will happen frequently!) Get back up and keep trying. Strive to focus
on: What is he trying to teach me? How can I use this to help me as a mother
and as a person?
The teachings of Christ transcend time, culture and
dispensation. They are found in the Scriptures, and in the words of latter-day
prophets. I immediately think of the principles Jesus taught in the Sermon on
the Mount, of the lessons taught in the temple, of the latter day teachings
found in the Family proclamation, and of teachings given personally in a
patriarchal blessing. The Savior taught not only basic gospel principles, but
HE also taught virtues, attitudes, actions, and example. They are not just
things to DO, but a way to BE.
By small and simple things great things are brought to pass.
As a mother, I find a great deal of encouragement and hope in this teaching.
With Christ’s help, my little effort is enough to bring about greatness! All of
the teachings of Christ, and the characteristics these teachings inspire in me,
and in all of us, apply to more than a single day. They provide constant
support, guidance, and hope as we strive to endure to the end. Some days,
months, and years are easier than others. Through Nephi, Christ taught—Ye must
press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having perfect brightness of
hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward,
feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the
Father:Ye shall have eternal life. Something we are all working towards! As we
each continue to press forward…we will see progress, strength, and improvement
gained over time. We will be a little more patient, more quick to praise and to
apologize. And for me I will be a better mother.
It can be easy to get caught up in the small details. For
me: the lost sippy cup lids, and watercolor messes. The demanding work of
keeping the fridge full, and the laundry empty. The worry over school grades
and college scholarships. The work of buckling little ones in and out of the
car, spending our days in the details, and forgetting to see what the big story
is.
The sacrifices we make every day are not made in a losing
battle. They are the sacrifices of the victorious battle. They are the cost of
a winning war.
So Lay yourself down. Sacrifice yourself here, now.
Cheerfully wipe the nose for the fiftieth time today. Make dinner again for the
people who don’t like the green beans. Laugh when your plans are thwarted by a
vomiting child. Lay yourself down for the people here with you, the people who
sometimes annoy you, the people who get in your way, the people who take up so
much of your time that you can’t read anymore. Rejoice in them. Sacrifice for
them. Gain that which you cannot lose in them. A true love of the gospel
overflows and overpowers. It will be in everything you do, however drab,
however simple, however repetitive.
Everything we need to do to help our children progress is
meant to point us to Christ. All of those mundane tasks that mothers do are
symbols of some part of the Savior’s atoning mission. It is no accident that
these tasks are continuous. They are repeated over and over to bear record of
him.
Last week in RS we discussed “Standing in Holy Places”. We
were taught our home should be 2nd to the Temple. Which reminds me
of a quote by Stephanie Sorensen, “ Each of us have the opportunity to create
homes that are sacred, safe and sanctified like the temple. Can you think of
anything more divine than that? A mother is the temple matron in her own home,
doing all she can to make it a place filled with the spirit of God. A home is a
temple because important eternal work takes place there. The mother of the home
plays a significant role in creating that environment and in directing the work
within.” With this analogy in mind—I recall the grace with which temple matrons
and coordinators perform their work and how their smiles always make me feel
like I am being welcomed home. A reverent peace-filled demeanor. With that in
mind, I now realize that l can conduct myself in my home more graciously if I
patterned my attitude by their example.
Sometimes the work is hard and messy and laborious, but we
need to remember WHY we are doing this…to create an atmosphere where our family
and all who enters can feel the spirit and learn the teachings of Jesus Christ.
And it should be to that end that we do what we do. Not because we like crafts
or because we love to cook. Those are mainly means to an end…and that end is
bringing our children to the Savior.
I thought about the Savior wringing out cloths as he washed
the feet of his disciples, and the spirit confirmed to me that I truly could
“be the temple matron in my own home,” and that he would be very pleased if I
would consider myself in this light…and consider all who enter my home as
temple patrons to be served, taught, cherished, and loved.
I am convinced now, more than ever, that there are no small
jobs in the Kingdom of Heaven. The things that we do as Mothers, day in and day
out, are spiritually significant, for us and for our children and families.
Many of Christ’s teachings and characteristics are
interwoven within me to create the mother I have become. Hopefully, all of the
teachings of our Savior are intertwined in the way I strive to live and the
lessons I have learned in my role as a mother, just as they hopefully are for
each of us.
Is it easy? Only sometimes! There are days when I want to
say, No more Mom! Mom! Mom! No more Mom, I need money for this, No more, Oh
mom, I forgot to tell you about such and such. No more book bags, shoes,
jackets, dishes, and toys left lying around all over the house! But there are
also the rewards of hugs and kisses, of immediate forgiveness for harsh or
critical words, of watching children do and say things that remind me of their
father or of myself, of watching my children sing for Mother’s Day or primary
programs, of witnessing them making right choices such as baptism, of hearing
them bear their testimonies. These are the moments I thank my Heavenly Father
for His love and mercy, for His trust in me to be mother to His spirit
children, and for His Son, Jesus Christ, who taught us so simply and so
masterfully how to be better mothers, and how to be good and loving people.
These are lessons for a lifetime!
